


Locks of Love

by peachykory



Category: Degrassi
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-11 21:31:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7908319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachykory/pseuds/peachykory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While discovering herself and fighting a war in her mind, Zoë finds that opening your heart to someone isn't such a bad thing after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I. Holding Hands

Zoë didn't want to be there. The movies were a great idea when Tristan brought them up until he showed up with Winston and Goldi. He tried his best to make it up to her. Buying all the popcorn, candy, and drinks, but it didn't work. All she wanted was a night with her best friend and that wasn't even possible. She decided to suck it up and have fun. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as she thought. Winston was okay in her book and Goldi was nice enough.

The group of four were the only few in the theaters that night. The movie they were seeing had been out for a few months already and none of them had seen it yet. Tristan and Winston were gushing about this and that the entire time, leaving the girls to sit in silence.

Zoë wasn't a fan of horror movies, but everyone else wanted to see it. Being outnumbered, she had no choice. Every time a jump scare popped up, she grabbed Tristan's hand. He would just laugh and pull away from her to talk to Winston more. The next scare was so bad that she reached for Goldi instead, not paying attention.

Zo mumbled an apology and was going to pull away, but Goldi turned her hand and intertwined their fingers before she could do so. She leaned over close to Zoë, "You can hold my hand if you want." She said, squeezing it softly.

"Thanks." Zoë smiled over at her. She took in her face in the glowing light of the movie screen. She wasn't afraid to admit that Goldi was pretty, but right there in that moment - she was the most beautiful girl Zoë had ever seen.

She looked away, hoping that the dark theater hid her blush from the others. The night might not of gone as planned - but it was certainly improving.

The movie ended with your cliche scary movie ending and a freaked out Zoë. It was really dark outside with only the street lamps glowing to give them light. Goldi still hadn't let go of her hand and Zoë didn't want to let go of hers. Holding hands with Goldi was a nice feeling. They were soft and fit perfectly into hers. That - unfortunately - wasn't the only thing she was feeling then.

The feeling in the pit of her stomach was something she felt over the summer when she hung out with Grace. It was hard for her to think about, with all that happened between them. They still hadn't talked to one another and continued to throw dirty glances at one another. She didn't want that to happen with her and Goldi. She wanted to get closer to her, but after her past relationships, it probably wasn't a good idea. She wasn't even sure if Goldi was interested or not.

"I'm gonna give Winston a ride since he lives closer to me." Tristan said when they got into the parking lot. "Do you mind riding with Goldi?" He looked down at their hands still clasped together and smirked.

Zoë rolled her eyes and turned to Goldi. "Will you take me home?" She tried her best to act as if she didn't care, but deep down she was screaming for her to say yes.

"I don't mind." Goldi smiled. She said her goodbyes to the boys and let go of Zoë's hand to get in the car.

The loss of touch stung a little. Zoë wanted to reach out and take her hand again and never let go.But she couldn't. "She's just being nice, Rivas. That's all." She mumbled to herself. She kept telling herself that on the ride home. She didn't want to believe that someone as amazing as Goldi could ever like her. That just wasn't possible in Zoë Rivas' mind.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> II. Watching a Movie

The invitation to Goldi’s house felt odd. They had fun at the movies the night before - something Zoë wasn’t expecting. While Goldi was always nice to her at student council, she never expected her to be that nice. She didn’t think Goldi was into girl. Especially her. Zoë had thought about her all night. The feeling she had deep in her gut didn’t go away. She figured that she was just overthinking things and that Goldi was just being her usual friendly self.

Zoë rang the bell when she reached the top step of the house. Having second thoughts, she turned around to leave. “Zoë?” Goldi’s voice behind her called before she could reach the bottom step. “Are you leaving already?”

“N-no!” Zoë said, turning around. “I thought I left my phone in the car.” She pulled it from her pocket and held it up. “Guess I was wrong…”

Goldi smiled and motioned Zoë to follow her inside. The house was an open floor plan on the inside with the living room and kitchen being in the same open space. It was nice and cozy, unlike her own home which always felt cold and cramped. There were family photos on the walls with everyone smiling brightly and happily. A ping of jealousy hit her with knowing that she could never have that with her mother.

Zoë followed Goldi to the couch and sat on the soft cushion. It certainly was better than the movie theater seats. In front of her was an array of snacks and drinks along with a stack of chick flicks. “I figured that you would enjoy this a little more than last night’s movie.” Goldi said as she put the first movie into the dvd player. “And the added bonus of no boys.” She laughed.

“That’s always the best kind of day.” Zoë smiled at that. Goldi’s laugh filled the room with so much joy and that feeling of doubt instantly left her. This wasn’t something she needed to over think, she realized. This was what she was so desperate for in the first place. A girl friend who made her laugh, but also liked her for her. It was really looking like Goldi was starting to be that person. Of course Zoë was always going to keep her heart guarded, but what could Goldi do that someone else already hadn’t?

Goldi sat next to Zoë when the movie was started. Her leg was touching Zoë’s slightly and the feeling was making her head rush. She wanted to reach over and hold her hand again, but with no excuse that was impossible. Sitting close to her was good enough for now.

Zoë smiled at the thought of being getting closer to her. Goldi being friends with Maya would be a challenge and she didn’t want to bring her into their drama. She was sure that she knew about what went down. It never occurred to her that she could know until now. “Why do you want to be friends with me?” Zoë blurted out, her defense rising. This wasn’t what she wanted to happen, but it was. Once again she was overthinking it when she told herself not to.

“What do you mean?” Goldi asked, shocked by the sudden outburst. “I think you’re nice. The way Tristan always gloats about you, I thought it was time that I got to know you.”

Zoë’s head dropped, eye’s focused on her hands. “You don’t know what I’ve done… What type of person I am.” She shook her head and let out a bitter laugh. “You would run for the hills if you knew.”

“I haven’t started running yet,” Goldi said, placing her hand on Zoë ’s. The touch calming her some. “And trust me, I know. The halls are filled with talk. Maya has confided in me, but that’s not going to stop me from being friends with you, Zoë . I’m not that type of person.”

She wanted to tell Goldi “no.” Tell her she was wrong and that she wasn’t a person she should be around. Tell her that she would just hurt her and ruin her life if she stayed in it. She couldn’t, though. A huge part of her wanted that, but I looked like Goldi wasn’t going to take no for an answer. “Thank you.” That was all she managed to get out as Goldi wrap her arms around her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug. Maybe this wasn’t going to as bad as she thought. Maybe she could finally let someone in.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> III. Study Buddies

Zoë found herself back at Goldi’s house by the middle of the week. They’d been texting like crazy and hanging out after school when Goldi was done with all of her club meetings. The butterflies in Zoë’s stomach were still there, even after days of being around Goldi. They never went away and now she wasn’t expecting them to. 

She’d tried to get as much out of Tristan as she could about Goldi at lunch. Sexuality wise, at least. He just shrugged and quickly came to the conclusion that Zoë was head over heals for her. He wasn’t wrong, but Zoë wasn’t about to admit he was right. Not yet at least. 

When she got the door, Goldi was already there waiting for her. They walked into the kitchen and sat at the table where there were study books and snacks all over it. Goldi was always prepared for guest, Zoë noted. 

She sat in the chair at the corner of the table right next to where Goldi was. Their arms brushed across one another quickly and even though Goldi’s arm was covered - Zoë could still feel the electricity from the slight touch. “Maybe we should start with history.” She suggested, needing something to distract her. 

“Sounds good.” Gold grabbed all the notes they needed from her pile of papers and laid them out on the table. “I heard this was going to be a hard one.” 

“Aren’t they all?” She laughed. They only shared one class together during the first semester and she was hoping they would get more together next year. It was fun being in history now that she actually had someone in there to talk to. 

They spent most of the day talking rather than studying. They were getting to know each other more and more, both enjoying every minute of it. Zoë hadn't felt this good in a while. The raging war in her mind was still keeping her up at night. While she was with Goldi, it was starting to go away. It was still there, the unsure feeling she had about herself, and was hard for to not think about. For now, she decided to be happy. And being around Goldi made her happy.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IV. Lunch Date

Zoë  watched as Goldi walked to the picnic table at lunch that Wednesday afternoon. She’d been so busy helping Tristan out with the Snowball that they hadn’t had that much time to spend together lately. Zoë  stood when Goldi came near and hugged her tight. “Glad you could make it.” She said, trying her hardest to ignore the butterflies that were still in her stomach. 

“I wouldn’t miss our date for the world.”  _ “Date.”   _ The word was meant in a friendly way, but Zoë ’s brain couldn’t help but think of it in a more-than-friends way.

They sat together on the bench, side-by-side and talked about their day, ignoring the cold that was creeping up on them both. Goldi was glad to be done with dance plans and was excited for the upcoming break. Her family was going to visit her grandparents for the week of Christmas.

Zoë  wished she could say the same, but her break would be spent eating takeout and watching crime shows on TV. With her mother always working and no father - this was how things were. She had accepted that long ago.

“Are you going to the dance?” Goldi asked, once their holiday conversation died down.

Zoë  hadn’t planned on going even with Tristan’s constant begging for her to. She did promise to drop by to see his end results, but not stay the entire time. But… if Goldi was asking, then that might change.  She shrugged her shoulders, “I might go for a little bit.” 

“I hope you do. Maybe we can hang out for a little while?”

“Yeah.” Zoë  nodded, “I could probably stay for a little longer. Who knows? It could be kinda fun.”

“And I would love if we could have a dance together.” Zoë ’s heart nearly stopped. When she didn’t respond, Goldi put her head down, blushing. “Or not…”

“No, no.” Zoë  quickly tried to recover, “I would love to dance with you.” She watched as Goldi’s head lifted a smile on her face. She did that. Zoë  had been able to make Goldi smile the entire time they were together and Goldi the same for her.

“I can’t wait.” Goldi took her hand in hers and rubbed the back of it. It sent tingles down Zoë ’s spine. A good feeling she was getting use to again. She would go to the dance and have fun with her friends.  _ “You deserve it, Zo.”  _ She told herself. And, boy did she want to believe it. 

  
  
  



	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> V. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking about doing the next 5 chapters in Goldi's p.o.v. then switching back and forth for the last 5. What do y'all think?

The lockdown had everyone shook. Even after it was over and called off as a swatting, Zoë still felt uneasy. It wasn’t just the encounter with Maya, but her feeling for Goldi. She needed to talk to her. Tell her how she felt. It couldn’t wait any longer. When Zoë entered the gym, she headed over to Tristan who was standing near the food table. “Have you seen Goldi? I need to talk to her.” 

“She went to go check on Maya. Why? Are you okay? Where were you during the lock down?” He asked, frantically. Zoë couldn’t stick around to answer all of his questions, needing to find who she was looking for. She promised to talk to him later and walked over to the stage.

Goldi stood next to Maya comforting her. Zoë took a few steps closer until the blonde noticed her. “What do you want? Haven’t you done enough?”

“I…”

“She’s here for me, Maya.” Goldi interjected, saving Zoë from another harsh encounter. “I’ll see you later, okay?” She gave Maya one last hug before walking always with Zoë to sit on the bleachers.

“The lock down was kinda scary… They said it was just a prank.” 

“Yeah, I heard.” That wasn’t what she wanted to talk about. The feeling of nervousness washed over her and suddenly she had the urge to vomit. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself and sat up straight. “I have to tell you something. Please don’t hate me after.”

“I could never hate you,  Zoë. You can tell me anything, I promise.” 

Zoë knew the words she wanted to say, but couldn’t form them. “I… I…” She turned her head away and took one deep breath, “I really like you alot, but not in a friend way.” She said quickly, not even sure what she said herself. 

“You… Like me? Like, like me like me?” Goldi questioned.    
Zoë knew it was a mistake. Goldi didn’t like her back. How could she? “I understand… How could you like me like that? It was stupid of me to ruin our friendship. I ruin everything…” 

“No,  Zoë , don’t say that. I’m not upset with you. I,” Goldi took her hand before continuing, “I like you, too.” 

She lifted her head and looked into Goldi’s eyes, trying to find the lie in them. There was nothing but sincerity. “ But, are you even… gay?” Zoë wasn’t even sure if she herself was. 

“I’m bi. Mostly into girls, though.” Zoë saw how confident she was in telling her. She didn’t struggle to say the words. 

“I don’t know what I am. I just know that I don’t want to get hurt anymore and that I’m tired of hurting others… And that I really like you.” 

“Would you like to go on a date with me, Zoë Rivas?” Goldi asked. 

Zoë nodded, “I’d like that a lot.” 

“I never did get that dance you promised me.” Zoë watched Goldi stand and held her hand out to her. She took it, feeling much better, and followed her out to the dance floor. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VI. First Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the next 5 chapters it will be in Goldi's p.o.v.

Being nervous was an understatement. Goldi couldn’t help but wring her hands together after she knocked on Zoë’s door that Saturday afternoon. They were leaving for her grandmother’s that Sunday, so she had asked Zoe out for that day. She wasn’t sure if it was too fast after their confession at the dance the night before, but Zoë seemed more than happy to go. 

When Zoë opened the door, Goldi let out a small gasp. Goldi was used to seeing Zoë all dolled up, but never like this. She went all out with hair and makeup and it even looked like a new dress as well.

Goldi leaned in a gave her a hug, “You look beautiful, Zoë.” She wanted to compliment her about every little thing, but there wasn’t time for that. At least not now.

“Thanks. You look beautiful, too.” Zoë smiled at her.

Goldi thanked her for the compliment. She wanted to take Zoë’s hand, but was still unsure on how she felt. She didn’t want to push Zoë on anything and certainly didn’t want to push her away. She liked being around her. It was different than being with Maya who was boy crazy.

She could talk to Maya about anything and get an understanding nod and smile from her. It wasn’t that Maya didn’t want to listen, she just didn’t fully understand. Zoë did, though. She could relate to Goldi in ways Maya couldn’t. And that was never a bad thing in her book. 

When they arrived at the restaurant, Goldi held the door open for Zoë and the waitress seated them. They both ended up ordering the same thing and found out it was their go-to meal when eating there. Something else they had in common, Goldi noted. She was already planning on making it for Zoë one day. 

She listened on as Zoë talked about her West Drive days, Goldi shamelessly admitting that she’d never seen it before and Zoë promised to get the box set from Tristan for them to watch together.  Goldi was a little shocked that she didn’t own them, but didn’t ask any further, not wanting to pry on something Zoë didn’t want to talk about.

“I know we’ve been only hanging out for a few weeks, but I really like you, Zoë.” Goldi admitted once again, hoping this time they could talk more about what their future could be like. As friends or something more.

“I like you, too.” Zoë said as if it were obvious.

“Would you want a relationship or… just… friends?”

She watched as Zoë thought about it for a few moments. “I think we should stay how we are now. I like this relationship we have and don’t want to ruin it… Maybe give it a little more time? Just until I figure some stuff out first.”

“Oh, of course. I like what we have, too.” Goldi never wanted to push Zoë into a relationship. She was happy staying the way they were and would let the other girl take her time with whatever she needed to. “I’ll wait until you’re ready.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VII. Kiss

The break was finally over and Goldi was ready for the new year. She signed up for the volleyball team and was so ready for what was to come with the feminist club and student council. She was also so ready to see Zoë again. They’d text all through the break and even video chatted a couple of times. They were becoming closer and closer having deeper conversations about their sexuality and previous love life. Zoë opened up to Goldi about her doubts and self hatred and Goldi did everything in her power to help. 

She couldn’t find Zoë for the first half of the day and lunch was spent in the student council room going over the semester's schedule.  It wasn’t until seventh period that she saw Zoë. She was standing by her locker talking to a girl in her AP English. Goldi waited for her to leave before walking up to her. “Hey, Zo.”

“Goldi, hey!” She wrapped her arms around her and gave her a tight hug. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too. Sorry that I wasn’t able to find you sooner.”

“Don’t be. We get to see each other now. Can I walk you to class?”

Goldi nodded, “I’d like that.” They started walking to Goldi’s class - which happens to be right next to Zoë’s - and talked about what their plans were for the afternoon. They agreed to meet at The Dot for coffee and to catch up on things they didn’t get a chance to talk about. 

When they reached the classroom without thinking, Goldi placed a kiss onto Zoë’s cheek. She instantly stepped back, looking around to make sure no one saw. “Sorry.”

Zoe shook her head. “No, don’t be.”

Goldi nodded, “I’ll see you after class, then.” She watched as Zoë walked to the room next to her and then went into her own, sitting at the desk. Goldi couldn’t help but rub her lips, wanting to kiss Zoë even more now than ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure when the next update will be since this one came out so much later than usual.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VIII. Endgame

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be the last chapter because I honestly lost inspiration for this...

School was almost over summer just around the corner. Goldi was glad that it was coming to an end. Summer meant days spent at the park and beach. No school and no worrying about drama. The only thing she could think of that would be annoying was not being able to see‎ Zoë everyday. They were of course still going to hang out, but it probably wasn't going to be all the time.

Goldi still didn't know where they stood in their relationship. One minute ‎Zoë was all for it then the next she was back to distancing herself from Goldi. Goldi didn't blame her and certainly didn't want to push her. 

Once Goldi grabbed her lunch for the day - she headed to the student council room to eat like everyday. She was surprised to see that Tristan and Winston weren't there, but instead only ‎Zoë. usually they all ate lunch together. "Hey, ‎Zoë." 

"Hey." Zoe looked up from her phone, acknowledging her presence. 

"Where are the guys at?" She questioned. Goldi didn't mind being alone with ‎Zoë. She prefered it in a way. "Are they ditching us?" She laughed. 

"Sort of. Tristan wanted to make some banners for the volleyball game tomorrow. He thought it would be better to do it now than wait until after school."

Goldi nodded. Tristan always told her when he planned on doing something that was closely related to student council. But with the recent race issues, she realized he probably didn't  _want_  her help. It was understandable. She looked back up at ‎Zoë who was just staring at her. Her eyes were soft with a small smile on her face. This was the ‎Zoë she liked. The sweet one. Not the nasty one that did whatever she could to get what she wanted. 

A tear leaked out of ‎Zoë's eye and down on to her cheek. Goldi wiped it away. "What's wrong? Aren't you happy?" 

‎Zoë nodded. "I am. I just... I..."

Goldi didn't interrupt. Whatever ‎Zoë had to tell her must have been important. Why else would she be crying?

"I'm..." ‎Zoë took a deep breath, the tears still streaming down her face slowly. "I'm... gay. And I really like you. But I don't think that's news to anyone, huh? I needed to say it for myself. It feels good." ‎Zoë smiled through her tears that Goldi realized were happy ones. It made her happy, too. 

"Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did."

"Thank you for not rushing me." 

Goldi leaned over and kissed her cheek. She could taste ‎Zoë's salty tears on her lips. They looked into each other's eye's before both leaning in to capture each other's lips. This was everything Goldi could have asked for. And she knew ‎Zoë felt the same. 


End file.
